i took it for love, or at least something beautiful out there in the spotlight.

one year ago this week i was returning home from los angeles.
i returned in the early morning, and we spent the entire day sleeping (and not sleeping) in my bed.
life was good and i was happy and we were happy.
it's not that i'm unhappy now.
not that if i were unhappy i would admit it.
i enjoy being the 'girl that's always smiling' at my new (not so new now-- year anniversary coming up!) job.
most of them don't know my story, and i guess i prefer it that way.
so i'm always smiling at everyone.
maybe why i'm happy is because they don't know anything about me.

just spoke with my coworkers wife.
she made it through the night.
i am so afraid.

there is always something heavier that makes your weight seem so silly.